You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
