Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
