I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
