from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
