So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize