Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize