My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
