Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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