Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
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