hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
