Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
