I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize