I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
