another moral hangover. fuck.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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