we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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