Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I intend to get homeless drunk
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize