Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Well I just put wine in my tea
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Randomize
