just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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