I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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