I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
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