As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
