We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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