there was a trapeze. enough said
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
