I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize