We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
