after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'm getting married
To pizza
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
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