he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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