I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
