time to smoke my breakfast
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
