We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
