You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
