Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize