So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
