I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
