The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
