Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
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