Texts From Last Night

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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.

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  (715): Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again. http://tfl.nu/2g9l
  Replies (28) Good night (1144) Bad night (3904)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"

  (219): View more from Indiana

  I have so much to learn from you, wise slut

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  (812): Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!" (219): I have so much to learn from you, wise slut http://tfl.nu/eyww
  Replies (20) Good night (3727) Bad night (827)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.

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  (660): We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend. http://tfl.nu/9y0s
  Replies (31) Good night (6064) Bad night (714)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  so i told him i still liked him. he laughed

  (1-954): View more from Florida

  well, your crazy. what did you expect?

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  (954): so i told him i still liked him. he laughed (1-954): well, your crazy. what did you expect? http://tfl.nu/3mre
  Replies (52) Good night (712) Bad night (3542)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball

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  (316): his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball http://tfl.nu/2uq9
  Replies (44) Good night (3919) Bad night (1116)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...

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  (512): Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame... http://tfl.nu/p4qb
  Replies (10) Good night (1061) Bad night (3317)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?

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  (317): about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight? http://tfl.nu/od5z
  Replies (9) Good night (852) Bad night (3567)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.

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  (720): I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group. http://tfl.nu/a06b
  Replies (7) Good night (5490) Bad night (774)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.

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  (336): Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy. http://tfl.nu/6oi3
  Replies (3) Good night (2790) Bad night (967)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.

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  (404): Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits. http://tfl.nu/2cej
  Replies (10) Good night (9646) Bad night (906)
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  (415): View more from California

  Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.

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  (415): Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit. http://tfl.nu/wqn3
  Replies (16) Good night (614) Bad night (2502)
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  3pm strippers are depressing

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  (320): 3pm strippers are depressing http://tfl.nu/w12t
  Replies (19) Good night (857) Bad night (1827)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.

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  (202): Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat. http://tfl.nu/b8sz
  Replies (4) Good night (497) Bad night (1608)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"

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  (304): He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance" http://tfl.nu/4970
  Replies (0) Good night (510) Bad night (430)
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  (619): View more from California

  I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.

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  (619): I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good. http://tfl.nu/rh08
  Replies (2) Good night (569) Bad night (359)

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