i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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