At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
