ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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