wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Randomize
