And the cops told us we were all naked.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize