College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
