So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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