Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
