i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
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