so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
