Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
