SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
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