Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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