yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Randomize
