ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
